February 2012
12 posts
Some times i feel like im living in a movie. The drama never ends the moment where things feel right something horrible happens. People change and leave you behind no one steps up for the things they believe in and when they do they get hurt. My life is all of it in one, there’s action, romance, drama, heartbreak, rejection, pain, adventure, mystery, and so much more. im pretty sure you guys feel that way to. i always ask myself, whats out there for me? Who’s out there? am i to a happy ending or a horrible end? So many questions out there and yet there’s just me. Everyone can’t tell who you really are till you open up and like in the movies the protagonist is afraid of what might happen. Im not gonna lie, like many others i’ve had my heart broken, yes it hurts and yes i would give anything to fix it, have i moved on? yes but a part of me will always die inside missing that person. they’ll never know how many tears i cried for them. how much i miss them, how much i truly loved them, how much i still do. Movies are like life and the heart break i had was an off screen moment. Their so much more in my life worth telling but i guess i’ll wait to tell.
Not to long ago i had a very disturbing dream. It not only haunted me in my sleep but it toyed with me during the day as well. Well it starts as most dreams do… black pitch black, I slowly open my eyes and I see the light, I find that I’m in my room on my bed as my vision begins to come in to focus. I look toward the open door and see a girl hurt, scared, angered, and dead crawl by. When I began to look around everything begins to blur and become out of focus and when it clears up I find myself in some sort of candy factory. Being the childish person I can be i was skipping around trying candies with friends. The candies were piled high in a rustic barrel, each barrel had a different type of candy, they were bright, colorful, and decorative. I was holding a bag full of candy in my hand and when I turned, the factory disappeared and I was back in my bed. I wasn’t the only one sitting on my bed. Some friends were there to talking and having a good time, I turned to my laptop and checked my Facebook I had a bunch of unread messages. When I opened them, my heart dropped the pain began to disperse from my heart it felt as if a electric wave of pain was traveling trough my body. My face was wet and it began to get hotter. What I had read was heart breaking messages from my boyfriend saying he didn’t trust me and that I was a horrible person. All of a sudden the room got darker the bed sheets were stained with blood. I turn to look around and the walls were not only covered in blood but with darkened faces trapped behind them, they were screaming a blood curdling scream the kind that makes your heart stop with fear, sweat drips from your face, your very skin crawls. They said “help, I just want to be free” or “come closer, I just want to switch spots” they were crying in pain suffering, trapped in a world I don’t want to know. the something came through the bed and grabbed me, I was immobilized, scared, sweating, I couldn’t move, so afraid, and all alone. Then I thought “Its a dream wake up! Cindy open your eyes, please get out of here wake up!” when I opened my eyes it was dark outside I turned to the clock and read that it was 3:19 I was sweating and it was extremely hot. I laid in bed thinking to myself, scared, alone, and afraid to fall back asleep. For the rest of the day that’s all I could see. the blood, the faces. all I could hear were the screams and cries for help. I did my best to stay away from the walls thinking something would grab me and pull me in.
I’m always there for you <3 i said id be and i am. i’ll never forget our past i promised i wouldn’t. i wouldn’t forget a promise. i know we had our ups and downs but its ok i forgive, i understand. i thought i say its fine don’t worry about me cause well I’m happy now :) i have him and you have whatever makes you happy. i only wish the best for you. I walked and re-looked over the past but now i may be just one step ahead of you. don’t worry about everything we shared and said i won’t say a word, just never forget us cause you were something special to me and that’s what counts. us may be over but our stories continue.
So it started out with an iPad I was watching a game trailer about little sisters from bioshock. All of a sudden this scientist lady grabs me turns out she’s professor Lamb from bioshock. And injects some kind of serum in my neck which turns me in to a zombie/little sister. Everything is in black and white and I’m dizzy next thing I know I’m in a bed not my own but a little orphanage where other girls like me have been taken to. I see my older sister questioning why I can’t leave. Lamb says I’ve been chosen for for something more. Much sister starts to beat her. My eyes fade black and when My vision clears I’m in a shelter full of pokemon that are being injected with the same serum i Was injected with. I couldn’t bear to see this. So i started to free them. Out of no where Mario appeared and Was helping me. Kirby Was in the kitchen eating. and decided to help. when the alarm went off we started running trying to help the pokemon as well as myself escape. out of no where big sisters and Nazi zombies were after us Mario tried to hold them back but it didnt seem like enough. out of no where some halo characters were helping us hold them back and threw me a grenade belt. when Lamb caught me i started to fight back it was like a mortal kombat/street fighter fight just about when she was going to try to chain me down i somehow got away with her and the big sisters chasing after me i didn’t know what to do. when i ran for cover some zombie pokemon and Raiden (from MK) came to protect me i blacked out and woke up in a room with everyone around me. Lamb rushed in and grabbed me trying to inject me with my last dose of the serum. i woke up breathing hard and wondering where in the world did that dream come from. O.o